December
15
Tags
Complaint Free and Be a Grape.
“Una uvam videndo varia fit”
Translation: One grape ripens another
I recently read a book called A Complaint Free World by Will Bowen. It’s about taking on the challenge to not have one complaint, criticism, or gossip exit our mouths… for 21 days. We can think it all we want which is a small relief because I can tell you…it’s hard!
Apparently I complain a lot. Apparently a lot of people around me are annoying and dumb. Apparently my life is so horrible as to be almost unlivable.
And yet that is heartily untrue.
Here’s the gist: (take notes please because I am recruiting)
- Criticism is complaining with a sharp edge, directed AT someone with the intent of changing their behavior.
- Complaint is to express grief, pain or discontent. It’s a complaint if you want the situation to be other than it is and NOT just a statement of fact.
- Gossip is what we say about people that we would not want them to hear. If they were staring you in the face would you repeat what you said word for word and would they feel complimented?
The Process:
- Every time I criticize, complain, or gossip I switch a bracelet from one wrist to the other. (click here to get a free one!)
- The Goal: 21 days with out any bracelet switching! According to the book this can take anywhere from 3 – 9 months to accomplish. (I’m betting I’m closer to the 9)
We change our words, we change our thoughts, we change our lives. I’m a writer, I already believe words are powerful. But don’t take my word for it.
It’s been proven.
I was reading this book thinking, “yeah but what about venting? Venting is good for us right?” Venting does nothing but manifest more of what we don’t want. When something goes wrong and we complain about it we send the message that bad things are expected.
The universe hears this, oh yes, I believe she does. And the tricky gal sends more.
Then we get stuck in a loop: Complaint, manifestation, complaint, manifestation, complaint…
We all have the right to get what we deserve and desire, to get to the good stuff of life. What would it look like, smell like, FEEL like when our problems (or just this one in front of us now) are a distant memory? Don’t think about HOW that will happen, just think about the solution being REAL, right now, right here.
That feels pretty damn good.
“The best way to destroy an enemy is to make him a friend.”
~ Abe Lincoln
Problem = Opportunity
Have to = Get to
Set back = Challenge
Tormentor = Teacher
Pain = Signal
I demand = I would appreciate
I have a complaint = I have a request
Struggle = Journey
You did this = I created this
Just typing out this list, I kinda feel better already.
I feel better, I believe better, I am better… and I send out a vibration that others can feel.
It happens every season. Each season one grape starts. This one little grape decides to move forward, onward and upward, this one grape decides to ripen. This decision of courage sends out a vibration that the other little grapes can feel. And guess what? They decide to follow.
So I’m gonna be a grape, and all the other little grapes can join me. I bought my bracelet and now I get to pick a date to start. Holidays seem especially great way to torture myself (ummm teach myself) through this challenge.
my bracelet (not the sparkly brown one…the other one)
Tip: bracelet needs to be easy on easy off especially in the beginning. I have yet to start this challenge though I have had this bracelet for over a month, as have two other co-workers who I have roped into doing this project with me.
Two final things: The beer might be helpful. I am noticing, thanks to the pic, that I need lotion.
Start Date: December 16th, 2013
Who wants to be a grape? Care to join me?
Intrepid Women 
I think you have something here, Kate. With families gathering around and the holidays almost upon us, there is such a temptation to offer advice, critics, well-meaning supportive phrases, etc., etc. I don’t think a bracelet can get here soon enough to help mewith my current guests so I have put ona snappy rubber band just nowto help me resist what I know will be my”helpful” comments. Thank you for alerting your readerson how to be better people.
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Snappy rubber bands are recommended as well – perfect idea! Work in progress but we shall prevail!
I absolutely loved this blog Kate! I am willing to be a grape with you in practicing not complaining, criticizing, or gossiping.
Two scriptures came to mind as I read your blog.
“gossip separates the best of friends” ~ Proverbs 16:28
“Don’t criticize each other, if you do you fight against loving one another~James 4:11
I am putting on a bracelet today & will be conscious of my words ❤
Thank you Elisabeth and thanks for joining the team! I look forward to when we meet we can discuss how we are doing =) Yay to grapes!
Ok, I’m in! Although I’m getting a bit of a late start since I’m just getting to your post today. I’m excited to give this a try, I have no expectation that it will be easy….I suspect the first few days will be very “quiet”…he he. Great challenge Kate! Good luck everyone
Yay Lynn! We can talk to each other… and be really quiet =) I already had to switch bracelets to a stretchy one… I was switching it too much! SO far today I think I already switched it 3 times.